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i keep changing my mind

Tuesday, July 28, 2015


I saw about fifteen baby toads today when I did door-check. I kept throwing them away from the golf cart so I wouldn't run them over. It was just after a short, but hard rain and there was an unbelievable amount of them. I went to the next door and then I saw the littlest hopper and it was headed right toward my wheels! I picked it up and threw it as far as I could and I saw it finally go the other way. Nice sunset too but I didn't get a picture.

Friday, July 24, 2015


Wow, I haven't been on here in forever. Went to see Andy Clausen and Pamela Twining read at Mike and Nico's backyard (still wondering if the name was influenced by the singer). They are self-proclaimed beat poets and were quite good. Pamela's work was very erotic and passionate and Andy's pieces were humorous and some of them kind of read like a screenplay but it was still a poem if that makes any sense. Anyway, went with my poet and artist friends. I haven't drunken that much San Pelligrino fancy water in a long time. There was wine and weed there but I'm in a good place so I wasn't tempted.

Sunday, January 22, 2012


It's been awhile. I got a new/used car. It's a 2001 Toyota Camry and it has some miles on it but the body is nice and its innards are good. I had my mechanic check it out before I got it. My Mom helped me out some but I paid her back about 80% of the down payment. I do have a car payment now but it's manageable as far as I can tell right now.

Now I'm just dealing with changing my insurance. My insurance guy shopped around and he got me a deal but it hasn't gone through yet. I'm waiting to do my emissions and plates until he changes it. Got to call him again tommorrow. I have been worrying about it all day because he is taking so long. I just have to trust that everything is going to be ok and it will all get done.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

9:27PM - baby jesus prank

my boyfriend found this tonight

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

9:53PM - news

Although I had what would be termed a bad summer, i have to admit that I created a lot of distress. This is especially true because I got a speeding ticket in Louisville on Monday night and then a parking ticket right in front of Twist and Shout (record store, etc.) in Denver on Tuesday. This is a direct result of drinking Mountain Dew and not inserting quarters.

My good news is that I have been writing like hell. Not all of it is great or anything, but just the fact that I am doing it makes me happy.

Friday, August 7, 2009


I got new readers today. I really need to get prescription glasses, but I just haven't gotten around to it. I paid cash for them at Walgreen's and they are pretty generic-looking but they work. They aren't full strength but I lost my purple pair so I had to get a replacement.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

5:22PM - movie

Last night we watched "Dig!" which my partner hated. I still think it's the greatest rock movie ever, but I have strange taste. It would be fun to see what any of those bands or people are doing now since that was circa 1995 and later.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

6:17AM - superstition and ignorance

Kinda go hand in hand with the movie I'm watching on tv right now. Something about a priest and a medievil witch hunt. Just reminds me of that song they play on 101.5 but i think it's already "over."

Monday, July 13, 2009

4:34AM - blah

I know. I know. Quit bitching and start a revolution or something like that, but it's 2009 so I guess i will just keep doing the usual stuff. Workworkwork. play. work. work too slowly. get yelled. get distracted. work like hell. get distracted again. more coffee. more coffee. oh no. ho, the evil bean rears its ugly lil head. oh no. not the computer. oh god. not her again. oh no. oh no. no no no. heh, it's five o'clock five o'clock can i drive like this? I'm nutz man, nuts. crud. i hit a pothole. have to drive straight. play play music. go home unlock door take shower. i'm tired so tired more work work work work. drive drive to the grocery store. lady with cart. she won't move. she won't move and i'm trying to get some vitamin water. oh god go away lady. just go away. i'm just a very sick chile. leave me alone. don't hit me with your cart. get out of the way. don't drive me to extremes. i'm just checking out. out. out. oh hell. time to go home. home. how is home. were tired. tired. must make dinner now. but i'm fried. burgers and potato salad. and salad green salad. and i never sleep never sleep just stay up all night pick my teeth and read about Johnny Depp Mr. Depp. And i schlep thru life. it's time to sleep. i can never get enuff. i hope no nightmares drive me out of my room. i pray no nightmare on this night. i pray to help someone other than me. get my head straight. it's been a crazy day. it's over. it's over. goodnight goodnight goodnight. good night mr. and mrs. and miss. missy ma'am.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

7:33PM - Wilco Review-Red Rocks; CO; Satire

Please note: This is satire, opinion and based on the writings of Hunter S. Thompson. This is not to be taken totally seriously. Please take it with a grain of Salt. And have a blessed day.



3:44AM - also

The time settings on my journal are all screwed up. It's actually 9:40 p.m. What the//? I'm going to find out how to change this I guess.

3:41AM - more fun news

I also broke my left toe. The small one. I slipped on the carpeted steps that lead into the den flying ass over tin cups last night and almost toppled over one of my boyfriend's speakers. Then today they had to do my xrays twice because the machine went on the fritz. Whoever you are up there, please give me a break. I can't take no more.


My transmission got fixed and my car is fine by the way. It happened last week.

Friday, July 10, 2009


Wednesday, July 8, 2009


Well I am still working ten hour days. I am also busy always doing stuff at night but I love it. When I am busy, my head is less up my ass.

Went to Whole Foods deli in Boulder last night. It was just closing but I managed to nab some curry turkey salad before it closed. I dislike shopping sometimes though.

Current mood: awake

Monday, June 22, 2009


This is not really the greatest Sunday I have ever had in my life, but at least I have a job for now. I don't know how long I am going to have one because my Supervisor is dogging me like crazy for taking my boyfriend to the doctor and making my own appointments. I can't help if the boss (the big boss) made a rule a long time ago to work four tens in the summer. How is that my problem? So the supervisor asked me the other day when she could get a full days work out of me. I don't know what to tell her.

I saw my family earllier and had to get rides to Lyons both way because my freakin car doesn't go in reverse.
They are pretty cool but...Nice.

Current mood: aggravated

Friday, June 19, 2009

3:23PM - Decaf in Europe

(This happened last weekend but I thought it was a good example of how Boulder changes people.)

For Example:

My friend hated Boulder and the way the townsfolk acted there. She would always tell me it was the new L.A. and for me not to dress up when I went there. Here is my lil' tale of getting some evil bean with her.

So a friend and I were in this chain coffee house in North Boulder last Saturday night and she orders an Americano and I order a decaf and we both have separate transactions. I'm not even finished paying for my coffee. I'm handing the semi-handsome (but not in my opinion) sunken cheek male barista my debit card and before he can even swipe in the machine my friend goes--in super snobby voice dripping with distaste--"They don't have DECAF in Europe."

"But that's all I can drink this time of day," I protest.

"Well Jane they don't have it there. It's all caffeinated..." She says and then proceeds to describe to the colloge boy art school dropout coffee geek guy how she went to Germany for a month and then he starts talking about how he went to Europe while I'm blowing on the top of the coffee wondering what on earth is the big deal.

Nobody pays me any mind when I attempt to mention I lived in Europe for seven months in 1975 (London to be exact). I just can't keep up with these dopes.

So we sit outside the place which is closing, but I have to go back in for a lid. I pick one up at the station and I say to the guy, "Thank you for accomodating us" which I have to say twice coz he's higher than nine monkeys on something and he locks the door behind me.

I go back and join my friend.

I look back on it later in the day and realized this woman has put me into yet another trick-bag and has humiliated me in public. I realize it's no biggie, but I can't let it go.

So last night I find her card in my purse because she gave me about ten of them. On the back of it, her husband the artist drew a caricature of her in a cowboy hat surrounded by a circle of flowers holding a garden spade. In the white space with a black pen I draw a balloon coming from her head and write in it "They don't have DECAF in Europe!" and scotch-tape it to our fridge right next to the magnet I bought at the truck stop in Johnstown that says, "No Coffee. No workee." I am laughing my ass off.

I hope she sees it when she comes over next time with a potato salad for our annual summer barbeque.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

8:59AM - moving out

We finally finished moving. We live in Soutmoor Park which is SW Longmont. It's great because there are a lot of senior citizens and it was built in the seventies. Our house has two huge windows and a giant gold curtain that sweeps across the entire front window like a stage curtain. (Ok, so i was redundant oh well).

I'm at work and doing ten hour days with Friday off. I still stayed up late last nite to catch the first Conan now that he's taken over the tonight show. It was great but they haven't had the interupter yet. Aw shucks (at work).  I still like Pearl Jam.  Grunge is over, however, I think I still like it and stuff connected to it. I guess that makes me a huge dork but i don't care.

Friday, May 22, 2009

11:40PM - The Spirit

The Spirit is the biggest piece of shit to ever float in the bad movie toilet. It's not even good bad, it just sucks. The only part of the film that is worth watching is the first twenty minutes when our hero and Samuel L. Jackson kick each other's asses. In fact, that was the only reason I watched beyond the first act or what ever.

Scar Jo, unfortunately for her, was actually really good in this. It's sad when a slice of drivel like this where she plays a villianess with multiple costume changes is her best work, but it's better than the shit she did in her salad days.

This is where I stop playing movie critic and just be a bitch. The woman who plays the Spirit's ex love gets to be some super swank Forties Queen Pin who talks in double entendres, yet likes to copy her ass on the Xerox machine (my boyfriend just loved that part). She's spilling out of her dress and has so many diamonds that she can't keep track of them. What's a girl to do???

Why bother even mentioning the lousy acting or the fact that this is supposed to be a post-modern period piece which i failed to understand not having read the comic book.

The person who wrote this should have stayed in one time zone and got Angelina to play the villainess. (or me-ha).

Anyway, that's my lil two cents for the evening.

Current mood: aggravated

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

1:06PM - bear!

Last Saturday, my boyfriend and I went hiking for a few miles on the Sourdough trail up near Jamestown. We started up the trail about four o'clock with knives and mace, some water, some Emergen-C, and a few pieces of potato bread and a Reese's peanut butter cup that I won in a bet that Obama would get the nomination (called the Obama bar).

Anyway, we went up and down and around and it was nice because it was overcast so it wasn't overwhelming. We made it about 2 or 3 miles and then ran into Camp Dick. While I used the restroom, my boyfriend inquired about the camping accommodations and then we waved and started back down the trail. There was a nice family in front of us for a few minutes from the camp, but then we were alone again. It was dark, but it wasn't really night yet. I'm guessing it was about quarter of seven.

About I'd say one or two miles from the camp, I heard a branch break in the quiet, pastoral forest and I said to my boyfriend, "I just heard something break."

"I did too," he said and then we heard it again.

I looked up and there about fifty or sixty feet from us was a cinnamon-colored bear cub looking at us in the tall grass. You could see only his torso and face. He looked to be about a year or a year and a half at the most.

My breath stopped for a second, and all of a sudden my boyfriend shouted as loud as he could and the bear turned around and ran the other way. I jumped about twenty feet in my head and came back down to earth slowly - my heart pounding.

"Get your knife and your mace out slowly, " He said softly. "And stay close behind me to make us bigger."

"Ok," I said catching my breath. I got out my buck knife and extended it in my left hand, but then I had to switch hands to get out my mace and then switch back hands.

He told me to walk down the trail looking down the embankment in a 180 degree peripheral while shouting as loud as I could. We did this all the way back to the start of the trail. About fifty feet as to where the trail began, he told me to withdraw my knife so I did. I just had the mace. Then we got back and I withdrew my keys and we took off our gear and got into the car.

We drove to a camp with three men and a woman who had some sort of lean-to and were drinking beer. We told them about the bear and the guy said they had nothing to worry about. They were sleeping inside the shed tonight.

Then we drove past five women campers who had a red truck and a tent. We told them and they thanked us profusely. I told them to lock up their food in their truck.

We waved and left. I didn't tell them I had the Obama bar and the potato bread in my backpack. It was an amazing experience, but if the mother had been close by, we would have been in big trouble. I wasn't even sure it was a male. In fact, I thought it was a female, but the boyfriend thought it was a male.

We were exhilarated and told the tale at the Millsite later over Italian food. I brought the food back. The Obama bar is in the freezer. I'm waiting to break it open after the General Election.

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